day 13

i have been reading from a site that has 30 daily Ramadan prayers- today, one of the lines in the prayer was "make me patient over events that are decreed." sigh. i accept that- difficult to do, but i accept that.

my reading today was like life to me. living, breathing words that spoke directly to me. encouraged me. made me smile with gratitude. my reading from the Quran was mainly about Moses. God had a task for him to do- a plan for his life- and Moses was afraid. he felt inferior. he wondered how he would be able to do what was being asked of him. God reminded him of how he had gotten this far...how his life was spared and how miraculously he was shown mercy for his own mistakes. He said, "I have made you just for Me."

sometimes, it takes being reminded that even in our own self-sufficiency- our own independence- we are granted the gift of life and not for our own purpose but for something much greater. i was created for Him. every trial, every blessing, every bit of growth, every failure, every gift of abundant mercy is not for me. every talent, every weakness, every gift...it is greater than me. i have been made just for Him. this journey...this road i'm travelling on...is so that i can, at the end of the road, stand confident that i have accomplished what i was made for...for the purpose of God. for the pleasure of God. for the will of God. if i fail to realize this daily- i am living in vain.

this humbles me. my purpose is so much greater than me. i long to walk with purpose- for every step i take to be ordered before i have even put my foot on the ground. when we walk in this way- it is impossible to fear. it is impossible to be anxious, because we realize that we were not created for ourselves, but for God. and God does all things well.

"Be at rest once more, oh my soul, for the Lord has been good to you." psalm 116

"How can I repay the Lord for all His goodness to me?" psalm 116

"Give thanks to the Lord for He is good...His love endures forever." psalm 118

scattered thoughts today, i know. but this is my journey. my spiritual journey and this is day 13. a day filled with peace- a day that was filled with deep thoughts but still productive and peaceful. i trusted today...believe it or not. i rested...in the knowledge that His ways are better than mine. i must believe that.